Workflow
What Is a Coffee Chat? Questions to Ask and How to Follow Up
A coffee chat is a short, informal talk about someone's work. How to ask for one, the questions to ask, what to write down, and how to follow up after.
A coffee chat is an informal conversation, usually 20 to 30 minutes over coffee or a video call, where you ask someone about their work, their career path, or their company. It is not a job interview, and there is usually no job on the table. You ask the questions, they do most of the talking, and you leave with advice, a name or two, and a clearer picture of a field you are trying to get into.
The part most guides skip is when the value turns up. Almost nothing a coffee chat gives you arrives during the chat. The introduction comes a week later, the role opens a month later, and the relationship forms when you report back on their advice. A coffee chat is worth exactly what you carry out of it.
What a coffee chat is, and what it isn’t
The term covers a few different situations, and it helps to know which one you are in.
- Career exploration. You are curious about a job, an industry or a company, and you ask someone inside it. This is the classic coffee chat, and the one most people mean.
- Recruiting coffee chats. In investment banking, consulting and some tech companies, students and career changers have coffee chats with people at the firms they are applying to. These are friendly, but they are not neutral: the person you talk to may be asked what they thought of you. Treat them as informal, not off the record.
- Internal coffee chats. A new hire meeting colleagues on other teams, or someone exploring an internal move. Lower stakes, same shape.
Here is how a coffee chat sits next to the conversations it gets confused with:
| Coffee chat | Informational interview | Job interview | Networking event | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Who asks for it | You | You | The employer | Nobody, you meet by chance |
| Typical length | 20 to 30 minutes | 30 to 45 minutes | 30 to 60 minutes | 2 to 15 minutes per person |
| Who asks the questions | Mostly you | You | Mostly them | Both |
| Job on the table | No | No | Yes | No |
| What you leave with | Advice, names, a relationship | Detailed research on one role | An offer or a no | A name and one thread |
An informational interview is a more structured coffee chat, built around research questions about one specific role. Most people now use the two terms interchangeably. For the event version, where you meet people by chance rather than by appointment, see networking tips.
Why the value arrives later
The coffee itself is the cheap part. It is thirty minutes, and both of you leave having had a pleasant conversation. What makes it worth something is what happens afterward, and almost all of that is on a delay.
Look at what each of those depends on. The thank-you needs one specific thing they said. The introduction needs you to remember that they offered it, and to whom. The role needs them to remember you when it opens, which is far more likely if your thank-you showed you were listening. The report-back needs you to remember what they advised, months after the fact.
Every one of those depends on details that will have faded by the next day if nobody wrote them down. That is the structural reason most coffee chats lead nowhere. The conversation usually went fine. The details that make the follow-ups possible were never saved.
How to ask for a coffee chat
Keep the message short, say why them specifically, and make it easy to say yes:
Hi Priya, I’m a second-year accountant thinking about moving into FP&A, and I saw you made the same move at Northwind two years ago. Would you be open to a 20-minute coffee or call in the next few weeks? I’d love to hear how you made the switch. Happy to work around your schedule.
Three things make this work. It names a specific reason you picked this person. It asks for a fixed, small amount of time. And it puts the scheduling burden on you. If you got their name through someone else, lead with that, because a mutual connection is the strongest opener you have. How to ask for an introduction covers getting one first.
If they don’t reply, one polite nudge after a week is fine. Two is too many.
How to prepare
Ten to fifteen minutes is enough.
- Read their LinkedIn and anything they have written or said in public, so you don’t spend the chat asking what their job is.
- Decide what you most want to learn. One clear question beats ten vague ones.
- Write down three to five questions, ordered so the most important comes first in case time runs short.
- Have a one-sentence answer ready for “So what are you looking for?”, because they will ask. How to write an elevator pitch covers the short version.
The person who asked usually offers to pay for the coffee. Many senior people will insist on paying anyway, and it is fine to let them.
Coffee chat questions to ask
Good coffee chat questions get the other person telling stories rather than reciting their résumé. Pick a few from each group.
About their path
- How did you end up in this role? What did you do before?
- What surprised you most when you started?
- What would you do differently if you were starting now?
About the work now
- What does a normal week actually look like?
- What’s the hardest part of the job at the moment?
- What separates the people who do well here from the ones who struggle?
About the field
- Where do you think this field is going in the next few years?
- Which skills are getting more valuable, and which less?
About you
- Given what I’ve told you, what would you do in my shoes?
- Is there anything in my background that would worry a hiring manager?
To close
- Who else do you think I should talk to?
- Is there anything I can help you with?
Some of these are worth more than they look, because of what they hand you afterward.
“Who else should I talk to?” is the most valuable question in a coffee chat. It turns one conversation into several, and an introduction from someone who just spent half an hour with you carries real weight. Ask it near the end, once they understand what you need.
During the chat
Let them do most of the talking. You asked for their time to hear about their experience, so aim for them to talk about three quarters of it. Follow what they say rather than marching through your list; the best answers usually come from your second question on the same topic. How to practice active listening covers the habits that make people feel heard, and how to make small talk covers the first two awkward minutes.
Watch the clock. When you reach the time you asked for, say so: “I know I asked for twenty minutes, and I want to respect that.” They will either wrap up or tell you they have more time. Both are good outcomes, and the offer itself gets remembered.
Take notes if it feels natural, in fragments rather than sentences. If it doesn’t, put the pen away and write it all down straight after.
What to write down afterward
Do it within the hour, on the walk or in the car. Recall drops fastest in the first hour after a conversation, and the specifics that make a follow-up possible are the first to go.
You don’t need a full write-up. Four lines cover it.
- Advice. The one or two things they told you that you might act on.
- Names. Anyone they mentioned or offered to introduce you to, and why.
- Timing. When something is likely to happen: a hiring cycle, a reorg, a role they think might open.
- Their thing. One detail about them that has nothing to do with your career. The marathon, the kid starting college, the house move. This is what makes a later message read like it came from a person.
How to follow up after a coffee chat
Within 24 hours: the thank-you. Short and specific. Mention one thing they said that was useful, and if they offered an introduction, say you would welcome it.
Thanks again for the time today, Priya. Your point about choosing scope over title was the most useful thing I’ve heard since I started looking. If you’re still happy to introduce me to Ben, I’d really appreciate it.
Generic thanks gets forgotten. A thank-you that quotes their own advice back shows you were listening, which is the whole impression you are trying to leave. How to write a thank-you note after a meeting covers the form.
Within a week: act on the introduction. If they introduced you, reply quickly, thank the introducer, and take it from there. If they offered and haven’t done it, one gentle reminder after a week is fine. Following up after a warm introduction has the details.
When something happens: report back. This is the step almost everyone skips, and the one that turns a single chat into a relationship. When you take their advice, land the role, or talk to the person they suggested, tell them. People who give advice rarely find out what happened, and they like to.
I wanted to close the loop. I took your advice and went for the smaller team. I start at Halcyon in March, and the intro to Ben was a big part of it. Thank you.
Later: check in with a reason. A second conversation makes sense when there is a real reason for it: you took their advice somewhere, something changed in their field, or you can help them. “Just catching up” is weaker than “I remembered you were running Boston. How did it go?”
If a recruiting coffee chat turns into an interview, the follow-up changes shape; see how to follow up after a job interview.
Look for patterns across chats
If you are exploring a career change, you will probably have five or ten coffee chats over a few months. Read across your notes and patterns appear: three people independently recommend the same person, two warn you off the same kind of company, everyone says the certificate doesn’t matter. Those patterns are some of the most reliable career information you will get, and you can only see them if each chat left a note behind.
Where Intriq fits
Intriq is built for the note after the conversation. Say or type what happened on the walk out, something like “Coffee with Priya, she says scope over title, offered an intro to Ben at Halcyon, Northwind hires in January, she’s running Boston in April”, and Intriq files the advice, the introduction and the timing on Priya’s profile and turns the follow-ups into reminders. When the intro comes through, or January arrives, the context is there before you write the message.
It is a private memory for your own relationships, on iPhone and in any browser, rather than a shared CRM. That suits coffee chats: these are personal notes about people who did you a favor, not pipeline data. For a wider look at tools for this stage, see the best personal CRM for career changers.
Key takeaway: A coffee chat is a short, informal conversation where you ask someone about their work. Ask for 20 minutes, prepare three to five questions, close with “Who else should I talk to?”, and write down the advice, names, timing and one personal detail within the hour. Then thank them within a day and report back when their advice leads somewhere.
FAQ
What is a coffee chat?
An informal conversation, usually 20 to 30 minutes, where you ask someone about their job, career path, or company. It can happen over coffee, on a video call, or on the phone. Unlike an interview, there is no job on the table and you ask most of the questions.
What does a coffee chat mean in recruiting?
In recruiting, especially in finance, consulting and some tech companies, a coffee chat is an informal conversation between a candidate and someone at the firm. It is meant to help you learn about the firm, but it also leaves an impression that can get passed on. Prepare for it as seriously as a short interview, without treating it as one.
How long should a coffee chat be?
Ask for 20 to 30 minutes and keep to it. If the other person wants to keep talking, let them, but don’t be the one who runs over.
Who pays for a coffee chat?
The person who asked usually offers to pay. If the other person is more senior they will often insist on paying, and it is fine to accept graciously.
What should I ask at the end of a coffee chat?
“Who else do you think I should talk to?” and “Is there anything I can help you with?” The first turns one conversation into several. The second makes the relationship run both ways.
How do I follow up after a coffee chat?
Send a short thank-you within 24 hours that mentions one specific thing they said. Act on any introduction within a week. Then report back when their advice leads somewhere, which is the follow-up that turns a single chat into a relationship.